Don’t Confuse What I Do With Who I Am


Stephen F. Dennstedt

Don’t confuse what I do with who I am. I will be the first to admit I visit some interesting and exciting places and engage in adventuresome activities on occasion—but that doesn’t, by extrapolation, necessarily make me an interesting, exciting or particularly adventuresome person. In fact my ex-wife would probably describe me as boring (her euphemism for it when describing me to others was: Oh Steve, he’s a deep thinker (not in a good way)—accompanied by a sneer.

I recently took one of those silly Facebook personality quizzes that all too often hit really close to home. In this case it had me pegged 100%. The quiz boldly states that you can only be one of four basic personality types: Intelligent (Rational) Introvert, Emotional Introvert, Intelligent (Rational) Extrovert or Emotional Extrovert. If you’re interested in taking the quiz for yourself here is the link. I scored as an Intelligent Introvert. Which is absolutely TRUE based on the personality traits they list:

Calm, curious, smart and introverted. You are a Thinker!
You are a very thoughtful, reasonable, reliable and quiet person. You seek balance in life and you are very content being alone.
You love reading books, learning new things, challenge yourself and have a good one-on-one conversation with an inspiring and knowledgeable person.

In other words, as my ex-wife would say, I am boring. I get it and I’m okay with it. Just because I’m different doesn’t make me wrong, and just because I don’t act with emotion doesn’t mean that I don’t have feelings. Although I’ve come to find out that it’s a lot less complicated just to declare upfront that I don’t have feelings (even if it’s not entirely true). I don’t need a lady in my life to fix me (I’m not broken) and I certainly don’t need someone around who is frustrated with me constantly yammering and criticizing. I go back to the italicized traits above and think to myself: that’s not a bad way to be. So I will continue to think, read my books, take my photographs, write my articles, travel the world, drink my Scotch and smoke my cigars—and lead my boring life.


Celestun, Yucatan, MX: Just another boring scene (taken a couple of mornings ago) from my boring life. I think I can live with boring.

8 responses to “Don’t Confuse What I Do With Who I Am

  1. And there are many of us who think your life is “grand”! Honestly, speaking for myself, I’m in the jealous category! Continue to enjoy your amazing life, Stephen.

    • Ha, ha, ha. THANK YOU Peggy. Many people think I must be a pretty exciting guy to lead the life I do, I just wanted to set them straight: although I lead an interesting life I am pretty much boring in person. 🙂

  2. I think I took the same Facebook quiz and it rated me as an intellectual introvert…pretty accurate. I’m much more conversant online than I am in person. I speak through writing and am uncomfortable face-to-face and especially in groups.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s